Kendrick agrees to deal not to walk near starting pitchers

On Tuesday, the Philadelphia Phillies avoided arbitration with Kyle Kendrick and agreed to a one-year, $2.45 million deal including clauses specifying acceptable proximity to players on the 40-man roster.

“We really like Kyle as a person, he’s a great kid with a bright future not on our mound,” said Phillies General Manager Ruben Amaro. “He’s really very personable and easy to talk to when most everyone else has gone home for the night.”

Kendrick himself was happy to be back in Philadelphia.

“I’ve enjoyed cheering with the fans over the past few seasons as this team has accomplished great things. I’m very much looking forward to watching what unfolds in 2011.”

When asked where exactly Kendrick would be watching from next season, Amaro explained that the contract is legally viewed by Pennsylvania courts as a restraining order with generous severance for the employee and permission to attend games as fan, either in the bullpen or stands.