Sources: Jayson Werth close to giving Red Sox them digits

After several days of trying to holla at free agent Jayson Werth, the Red Sox are finally close to getting them digits from the outfielder, team sources report.

“At first, they was like ‘Ay yo shawty, lemme holla at you for a minute.’ But Werth wasn’t tryin’ to hear all that,” one source said of the team’s previous attempts to court the All-Star. “But then, it was like ‘Baby, all I wanna do is get to know you a little better, nah mean?’ That’s when they got to conversatin’.”

Werth said Thursday that “it’s OK”  that the Red Sox are likely only into him because he is a professional baseball player since he is only drawn to the team for their money.

Oldest man in baseball pitches like oldest man in baseball

Phillies pitcher Jamie Moyer, who is baseball’s oldest player at 47, made headlines on Friday for actually pitching like you’d expect a 47-year-old man to pitch against a major league team.

Moyer allowed nine runs while recording only three outs against the Red Sox after pitching like a man in his prime in his previous six starts (2.76 ERA over 42.1 innings).

“He’s been pretty good for us lately and you kind of forget about his age for a minute there,” Phillies manager Charlie Manuel said of Moyer. “But then he gives up nine runs and you’re like ‘oh yeah, why is he still playing?’”

While the Phillies are hoping that Moyer regains his 45-year-old form, the team is also concerned with Joe Blanton, who has pitched like a 86-year-old with glaucoma and a touch of the gout.

Rumor: Halladay headed to Target for a couple things

Rumors out of the Winter Meetings in Indianapolis now have Roy Halladay headed to a nearby Target for socks and possibly some toothpaste.

“That’s what we’re hearing this morning,” said ESPN’s Jayson Stark of the potential Halladay move. “It could happen later in the day, but it looks like his wife is prepared to send him to Target for a few errands.”

It had been widely speculated that the Blue Jays would trade Halladay before the season starts to either the Phillies, Angels, Red Sox or Yankees, but now it appears the former Cy Young Award winner is headed elsewhere.

“I don’t know how much stock you can put in rumors like this,” said Ruben Amaro on Thursday. “Yesterday, the big rumor was he was headed to the Angels and now he’s going to a Target. Tomorrow it’ll be something different. I think I even heard something about him going to the Phillies. I know. Crazy stuff, right?”