Citing a desire to provide a better, more normal life for his wife, Phillies pitcher Ryan Madson announced his sudden retirement from baseball on Thursday.

Madson’s wife, Sarah, recently opened up to discuss her ordeal as the wife of a professional baseball player and detailed her profound disgust for Phillies fans which ultimately forced her husband to retire.

“It is because I don’t want to subject my wife to this awful existence that I have decided to retire from baseball,” said Madson, who ends a nine-year career with the Phillies in order to finally give his wife the normal, lower-middle-class life she always wanted. “No more Phillies fans bothering us all the time. Just a regular life with a stack of bills and no idea how to pay them just like everyone else.”

Madson, who will forfeit the rest of his 2011 salary of $4.5 million, will now try to search for a job for the next six months before being forced to work at McDonald’s for minimum wage until something comes up.